Tag: shyness

Campground JOY

Something I love is watching young children and engaging with them 🙂 . It brings me real JOY. Spending time on the road with my husband lends me many opportunities to do so–from campground to campground. Two short little stories for you that still delight me as I reflect on them:

An exuberant 4.5 year old boy. Me. I was sitting propped up at one of the only electrical outlets there was charging my computer and writing. Preschooler shows up nearby with his Mama and little brother. Rocks climbed. Rocks knocked off of rocks. Up, down, jumping. Mr. 4.5 looks over and sees me.   

“Whatya doing?”

“I’m working! Soon I’m going to be done and go play.”

“Whatya going to play?”

“Ohhh…probably climbing on rocks and jumping….”

“That’s what I’M doing! Watch!”  And again he climbs, jumps, and looks at me. “You have very strong muscles to move those rocks and climb so high to jump!” He grins and immediately begins all over again. Happily involved with his rock play. What better play IS there in a campground?! I so appreciated Mama, who stayed back and watched the work of her two little boys.

Mr. Exuberant 4.5 and I chatted a bit more about what he can do and he talked about camping here, and how daddy was cleaning and packing up cuz they were going home. Then, “You can come to MY house if you want!”

Me, “Oh! I like to play at houses….” and at the same time, as soon as he happily declared I could come play, he ducked around the side of the building and hollered out, NEVER MIND!”  Equally exuberantly from the Shy Perspective 🙂 .

I chuckled to myself…his sudden realization of “Oh my gosh I just invited a stranger and I’m suddenly super shy and don’t quite know what to do”...and I called out, “I wonder if you have Lego at your house? I have some at mine. I like to build with Legos!” I figured Lego is pretty universal…

And the wonderful magic started all over again…Mr. 4.5 back tracked, peered around the corner and said, “You DO? I do, too!” And then just as quickly he retreated…headed back towards his campsite…paused….then hollered over his shoulder, “MY NAME IS MICHAEL!” and off he dashed.

I called out equally loud, “MY NAME IS ALICE!” End of story. I so enjoyed how happily open and engaged he began, how he retreated, and how he “reached out” once again in a way he felt safe. Mama and I exchanged smile and off they all went.

A bit later (and this is story number two), I was walking through the campground and saw a Daddy setting up camp, his 3-year-old daughter standing near, water bottle clutched in one arm, special stuffed guys in another. Her big eyes watched me carefully as I neared. I smiled and waved. She watched. I said, “You have Special Stuffed Guys!”  She watched me carefully–so different from Mr. Exuberant 4.5, and equally “engaged” in the way she felt safe–clutching her guys and staying near her Daddy.

Daddy smiled. Looked at his daughter and said to me, “She has TWO special guys and one is an elephant!” I paused. I smiled at her and said, “Oh! An elephant!” (making my elephant trumpeting noise…hoping to get a smile…to no avail….). So I tried a slightly different tact, “We had Special Guys at our house, too. A kitty and a horse. YOU have an elephant!” And then I kept on moving past, Daddy said good-bye, I waved.

And then the ever-so-brief and equally wonderful magic occurred. Miss 3? She adjusted her water bottle to her other arm with her Special Guys, keeping her eyes on me the entire time, then waved. AND smiled. I walked backwards and continued my waving to her, she continued her bright-eyed smile and little wave back at me. It filled my  heart.

Oh how wonderful! By simply engaging from a “sideways” manner of talking less to HER and more just about my daughters’ special guys, she felt safe enough to respond. Just like Mr. Exuberant 4.5 who, though ever-so-openly engaged initially, found his comfort zone behind a wall and discovering Lego was a favorite of mine…

Find Alice’s books here!

It fills me, this connection with little ones. Today I hope you’ll pause enough to truly connect with another. Little ways or big ways. Notice and appreciate and be present to the bits of magic that happen ever-so-briefly at times. It truly can bring you JOY.

Alice

Author and Parent Coach

©2018 Alice Hanscam

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

All During Preschool Drop-off…

Moments caught and enjoyed today…

…The bright eyed 3.5 year old sharing with me her “sharing bag” for preschool. “I brought my ball!! Daddy blew it up cuz it was squishy and now it is hard…”  all while squeezing extra hard the round shape tucked in her preschool sharing bag. “My muscles are growing!!”  And off she danced carrying her bundle down the hall, eyes all a-twinkle…

…The toddler trooping in alongside brother and friend and mama to drop them off at preschool...his head cranked backwards as he found everything BEHIND him of much greater interest then what was in front of him. Tripping, plopping, up and trooping, always always with his head turned backwards… 🙂

…The HUGS as new-found-friends are re-discovered once again, as only preschoolers can do.  The DELIGHT with which they greet each other leaves one thinking it had been years…rather than a day or two! 

…The papas and mamas who all stopped in front of the preschool’s info board to read to their children what was happening in class that day. “Elephant valentines!” And off they’d go musing over just what an elephant valentine might be…

…The cling-on preschooler as mama tried to extract herself...“I see a post office! Would you like to go work on some letters to mail there? Or maybe bounce on the mini tramp…”  Her efforts were seemingly futile as her child continued to wrap her arms around her legs, fussing and whining…until…ZOOM a buddy went zipping by on a trike and off went the little girl to climb on another trike and join in on the driving-round-and-round fun…and mama left with a smile on HER face!

…The mama of twin toddlers who, following drop off of her older child, took the necessary moments to sit with them in the free play area and let them explore. What a delight watching them immerse themselves, mama fully present and quietly watching…and then when it really was time to go, they agreeably trotted off and out the door. Despite the fact mama had a ton of errands to run and a tight time frame, she knew by pausing long enough to give them their time, HER time would go so much better :-).

Find Alice’s books here!

Moments caught and enjoyed as preschool drop off continued. Boots being stomped to get the fresh snow off, lots of questions and conversations shared even as parents were rushing, turns taken as every single child wanted to be the door-opener-button-pusher. What a wonderful way to start MY day…so many smiles.

Enjoy your day! I am.

Alice

Author and Parent Coach

©2017 Alice Hanscam